BSG drabble: The Three Loves of Saul Tigh
Author: Karolyn Gray <kmgray3@aol.com>
Rating: PG
Synopsis: He only had three loves in his life.
Type: Drabble
Characters: Saul Tigh
Spoilers: minor ones for S2's Scattered
Warnings: none
Archiving: Yes
Word Count: 1,817
Disclaimers: Not mine. RDM said we could play with them. All Battlestar Galactica names, characters and other related indicia are the property of Glen Larson, RDM, Universal, the Scifi Channel and all associated parties. No copyright infringement is intended.



The Three Loves of Saul Tigh
By Karolyn Gray

Saul Tigh only had three loves in his life – really only two if he was honest with himself, but he wasn't. These three loves were all addictive, each unbalancing him one moment, steadying him the next. And he was certain he could not live with out all three.

'Two,' his conscience whispered conspiratorially.

The first, and oldest, love dated back the horrors of the Cylon War. That love had provided him liquid sustenance to hold the nightmares, the inadequacy, and guilt at bay. Color hadn't mattered: soothing warm brown, biting green, clear white lightening. It had kept him company on the long, lonely nights after his discharge from the service and his attempts to lose himself in the darkness of space after joining the merchant fleet. But his first love was a fickle mistress; as much a hindrance to his life as it was a much-needed crutch to fill the emptiness within him.

His first love had led him to his second love, his closest, dearest, and certainly now life long friend, Bill Adama. Adrift, Bill had drawn him in like two gravitational bodies attracted by mutual needs, interest, and the desire to belong to something bigger, grander; to be someone better. And so he had fallen into Bill Adama's orbit, forever linking their futures together, and joining the odd, disjointed family the comprised Bill Adama's life, secretly enjoying his favored 'uncle' status Bill's young sons had titled him with, and his friend's unwavering loyalty. A loyalty he returned tenfold even as Bill lost one son to death and the other to angry grief, as Saul himself lost two 'nephews' that had once made him regret not having children. This second love was constant, pure. Bill Adama had saved his life and given him meaning.

Surprisingly his second love had unwittingly and unexpectedly led to his third love, Ellen. Beautiful, light hearted, smart, accepting of his darkness. She said she loved him. He knew he loved her, beyond all reason. With her, he found his heart again. Bill Adama had saved his soul, but Ellen warmed the coldness of his heart. But like his first love, she could be fickle. Quick to flirt, inflame his jealousy and just as quick to bring on his forgiveness, his love. She had become his heart.

'But not your true love,' the whispers of his conscience reminded him.

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